So it begins…again

~ taytertalks ~ Leave a comment

Back in 2012 (if my memory hasn’t failed me), my boyfriend at the time set up a blog for me.  He knew that I wanted a platform to share my journey of self discovery with the world.  I thought it was so cute that he had “heard” me through all of our talks about my life goals, but I never touched the thing.  Not once.

I grew up dreaming about being famous, being heard.

baby tay walking on a ledge

It was as if that was the only thing that would bring significance to my life.  FAME.  It sounds so dirty when you think of it that way.  Significance.  I was certain, at the wise age of 10 years old, that if I just met Devin Sawa or Jonathan Taylor Thomas that they would fall in love with me and I would be set for life.  Looking back, I’m now less surprised as this point that I switched majors in college and studied Theatre Arts.  Always chasing significance and attention.

*Only child alert*

On the Verge

My point of all this is that this blog is not for seeking or attention or significance.  Maybe that’s why it’s taken me all these years to get started (and I’m still figuring out what that’s going to look like). It’s for sharing stories of triumph and failure.  It’s about growth, challenges and discovery.  It’s about goals, love, life, food and family.  It’s about friendship and being there for one another.

I am significant.  We all are.  This is about recognizing all the moments.

#TALYYOURMOMENTS

This is your time.

 

 

.Defeat.

~ taytertalks ~ Leave a comment

It happened.

The feeling.

DEFEAT.

Last night I stayed after work for a Happy Hour meet and greet event.  I had come off of a long 24 hours of traveling and dealing with the loss of someone dear.  I had three glasses of wine and was feeling great.  I mean, wine always makes me feel great.  Until the next morning when my head is pounding.

I got home around 8:30 pm and realized I was starving.  So I did what any normal person who is kinda drunk and dealing with food and body image issues would do.  I ate the rest of the ice cream in the fridge and ordered a pizza.  Okay, okay…I also ordered the parmesan bread bites.

As I sat on my couch, dipping my slices into the garlic butter included in my order, I started to think and be aware of how my body was feeling.   Sure, that pizza was AMAZING.  But I began to feel the grease on my face and fingers, the folds of my stomach over my comfy pants.  I began to realize how sad and weak and alone I felt in that moment but that each bite was filling me with a temporary sense of purpose and comfort.  But then the slice was gone and I was on to the next.

It wasn’t until I spilled the container of garlic butter on one of my throw pillows that I realized I was lost.  I was sad.  I was unhappy.  I had lost my purpose and was no longer celebrating my moments.  I had not had any victories.  I had not set and crushed any goals.  I also realized that my stomach hurt and I had a huge piece of pineapple stuck in my teeth.  It’s cool.  I was eating alone.

I woke up late this morning and I looked at my phone to realize I had 10 minutes to get up and get my ass to my workout.  I made a mini goal to make it because I had made a mini goal to get 4 workouts in this week.  I was 10 minutes late and had to do 40 burpees, but I made it.

I also reached out to a few friends to find support with my recent bout of depression after being assaulted.  But that’s a whole other post.

#goalsbeingcrushed

I stepped on the scale this morning and weighed 153 pounds.

It’s just a number.

It’s.  Just.  A.  Number.

let them eat cake! …just not yet.

~ taytertalks ~ 2 Comments

The lights go down.  The bikini comes off.  The contest prep is over.

You’ve done it.

You have earned your post competition meal.

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Many people have asked me what I decided to eat after months of meal prep and my final week of tilapia and asparagus.  I wanted a burger.  And sweet potato fries.  And a cocktail.  And a milkshake.  And luckily, I heard all about PARK BURGER in RiNo.

Before I start salivating over my meal, let me take a minute and tell you about the service.  THIS PLACE BLEW MY MIND!  And as someone who works in the restaurant business, that statement doesn’t come easily to me.  I called ahead to make sure that they had everything I was looking for.  The host was thrilled that I wanted to celebrate there and assured me that they would accommodate our large party.  And then, later that night, she actually hugged me when I walked in the door and congratulated me on the show.  When people choose to celebrate your victories with you, even as a stranger, it makes the world a bit brighter.  Just sayin…

Okay…but there BURGERS!  I mean…and their milkshakes!  And don’t get me started on their sweet potato fries.  This praise will have to be cut short, because I literally DO NOT HAVE WORDS!

#yum

We are now approaching a week since my show, and while everyone else is thinking that, “Now you can EAT!” “Back to real life!” “Let’s grab a drink!”, I’m starting to panic.  This time is crucial for my metabolism and I’m struggling to get back on track and transition into my normal diet.  Preparation is key and I finally was able to make some time and prep my meals.  It’s only been a few days, but I can see the changes happening to my body RAPIDLY from being off track.  Healthy and smart choices are always necessary.  NO EXCUSES.

I’m not psycho.  And I know that it’s nearly impossible to maintain a show figure year round, but I can’t stress how important it is to stay focused when you set a goal.  Even after you finish it.  Set another one.  And then another.  #alwaysevolving

Thanks for listening.  Any and all of your tips for staying motivated are welcome!  Everyone needs someone, and maybe your words of encouragement will make a difference for someone!

Peace, Love & Protein Pancakes

Team Fit Chick

~ taytertalks ~ Leave a comment

Aint Life Grand

It’s been a minute.  Life has been crazy!  But when is it not?

The WBFF Denver is tomorrow!

This has been a tough prep.  Between travel, new relationships gained, friendships lost, and $400 worth of prepared food being ruined during a hotel stay…I’m looking forward to all this hard work paying off tomorrow!  It doesn’t feel real, but it’s certainly happening anyway!

LAST DAY BEFORE THE SHOW!

#igetaplainburgerwithnocodimentsandabuntonight

Competing with #teamfitchick this year has been a life changing experience for me.  The friendships that have been created are some that I hope will last a lifetime.  Training for a show is isolating, so I would highly recommend competing with a team for your first show, or any show for that matter.  It’s your support system.  And it’s worth is for the group text feed that occurs during peak week alone.

#HILARIOUS.

Near and far, I’ve got an amazing support system.  So, special thanks to all my family and friends.

I couldn’t do this without you.

find your HAPPY place

~ taytertalks ~ Leave a comment

Selecting a fitness program can be really overwhelming, especially when you’re new to the workout scene.  I’ve tried many forms of exercise.  From the elliptical at the gym, The Firm at-home workout videos, Zumba…I’ve tried almost everything and I’m here to help.

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Finding your fitness groove is personal to the individual and it’s important to know what you’re looking for and for you to be comfortable.  I’m here to share some of my favorite programs, but this article, from Fitness Magazine, could also help you determine what style is for you.  Keep in mind, I’m not a doctor.  Please talk to your doctor before beginning any fitness program.

THE AT HOME WORKOUT

The Firm & Tone It Up

When I was in college, my mom and I both ordered The Firm workout plans from an infomercial.  We followed their fitness plan, and together, lost almost 30lbs.  That was back in the early 2000’s and times are a changing!  I still use their DVD’s when I’m in a pinch, and although they are a bit old school…they do the job.  They get me sweating!

More recently, I fell in love with the Tone It Up girls, Katrina and Karena.  Last year I completed their Bikini Series and it’s back!  Their newsletter is free and they have tons of free workouts online.  They also have a YouTube channel and you can complete any of their workouts on the go!  I splurged and bought their Nutrition Plan and their Beach Babe 2 DVD.  The girls are hilarious and their bodies are BANGIN!  Not only do they motivate me to put down the pizza and workout, but I also want to be their best friend.  Check them out!

BOOTCAMP

Bootique Fitness / Barry’s Bootcamp / Blunt Force

If you’re a lady looking for other ladies to motivate your fitness, I highly recommend Bootique Fitness.  A women’s only, outdoor boot-camp, you get SO MUCH for your money.  Multiple locations with morning and evening classes, you’re able to find your inner fit babe from their program all day, every day, in the great outdoors.  BONUS:  As a Bootique member, you’re also able to attend their Zumba classes for FREE!  I am a big fan of being strong, but I have fallen in love with the dance!  I dare you to try it.

A friend of mine also turned me onto Barry’s Bootcamp.  Another strength based boot-camp style workout, Barry’s pushes you to the MAX.  A 60 minute workout, your instructor splits the class between the dreaded treadmill and the floor.  Each day is a different muscle group and it’s not for the faint of heart.  You’ve got to work.  They are bit more expensive, but if you’re going consistently, you’re paying for results.  But have a I ever mentioned how much I hate running?  I love the calories I burn in their classes, but I dread those sprints.

In January, I bought a Groupon for Blunt Force Training.  They have some KILLER group boot-camps with rotating Trainers.  No two workouts are the same.  They also offer Strength classes, Yoga and Boxing!  I have never left that gym without feeling like I just got my ass kicked.  They are friendly, motivating, fun and the clients come in all ages, shapes and sizes!  The gym also has several Personal Trainers that have clients throughout the day.  Team Fit Chick, with coaches Alysha White and Kasey Wilson, train their competitors out of this gym too.  I’d call this one a one stop shop.  And the Unlimited Membership is a steal at $99/month.  Personal Training and competing are an additional cost.

THE STANDARD GYM

24 Hour Fitness / Chuze Fitness / Planet Fitness

I’m not going to take a ton of time between each of these gyms.  I know that some gyms offer fancy pools and saunas…but I would rather get a facial or massage from a specialist so I am all about the basics.  Most standard gyms have the same equipment and cardio systems, so for me, it’s all about the cost.  24 Hour Fitness is the most expensive of the three gyms I’ve been a member of, ranging from $30-$60/month.  At $10/month, for their basic membership, Chuze Fitness and Planet Fitness take the cake.  The only setback is most locations don’t have free barbell weights.  I like to lift heavy, but not for nearly $30/month more, so this isn’t a deal breaker.  Make sure you take a tour of the facility and really understand the equipment before you get started.  You want to make sure you get the most for your money!  Plus, most gyms are creating awesome circuit areas for you to get an awesome 30 minute Circuit Training session in.  BOOM!

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I hope this helps you make a better decision for your fitness.  Feel free to share your own experiences in the comments.  I would love to hear your recommendations!

Breakup Survival Mode

~ taytertalks ~ Leave a comment

How to Survive a Broken Heart

Ten not-so easy steps to help you through the rough spots.

Facebook Official Relationship Failure 101

1.Go through the motions

No, seriously.  You probably smell.  My mom always used to tell me to take a shower when I was sick, but it always seemed like way too much effort.  Well, 32 years of listening to her and now it’s my turn to give the same advice.  YOU ARE WORTH THE EFFORT.  Get up in the morning.  Take a shower.  Brush that mane.  Heck, brush your teeth since you’re on a roll!  Tell yourself that you deserve to take care of yourself.  I’m serious.  Say it out loud to yourself in the mirror.  Every morning will get a little easier and you won’t have to force it.  If you don’t have a routine, now is a good time to create one.    

2.Limit Social Media

Breakups just aren’t what they used to be.  With Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, etc…you can’t escape the constant temptations to check up on your ex.  I mean, we all do it.  Did he change his relationship status yet?  Am I still in his profile photo?  Did he untag all of our photos?  Who cares.  He decided to leave you.  You deserve to be with someone who would be with you NO MATTER WHAT.  And as much as you think it will help, defriending them isn’t always the cure.  Unfortunately for this post…I’m still figuring out what is.  

3.Join a gym

Taking care of your body is important.  If you don’t want to or can’t join a gym, get active and get the endorphin juice pumping!  

Summer is approaching and let’s be serious…you want a hot body for many reasons.  But right now, #1 being that you want to look like a SUPER FOX in case you run into your ex.  But remember, he shouldn’t solely miss you because of your hot body, just sayin…

4.Phone a friend

You know you’re obsessively checking the phone every time you get an alert.  You know that you’re hoping that it’s him every single time.  You know you want to call him.  You know you want to text him.  

Wellllllllll…you actually want him to do those things…#details.  

Do yourself a favor and designate a couple people to be your INSTEAD PERSON; because sometimes, all you’ll need to say is, “I’m calling you instead of (insert name of person who doesn’t realize what they are missing here).”  If they are a good friend, they will say and do all the right things.  Even if that’s telling you that it’s time to get over it and move on.

5.CRY

Feeling those terrible, ugly feelings is necessary.  It’s not what you want to hear and you will always look for a distraction, but it’s all part of the process.  Go all sorts of Kim Kardashian…cry like no one is watching.

6.LAUGH

Listen to a comedy station on Pandora.  Go see an improv comedy show.  Call your funniest friend.  Life will go on and the world will keep on spinning.  There are so many amazing and beautiful moments in this world to celebrate.  Just because you’re heartbroken, doesn’t mean that you don’t deserve a good belly laugh.  Don’t they say that laughter is the best medicine?  

Well, I happen to think it’s true.

7.Do better

With every relationship, hopefully you have learned something.  Whether it’s what you want in a partner,  how to love and be loved or something you will never settle for again…LEARN FROM THE RELATIONSHIP.  Do better.  Be better.  You should never settle for anything less than you want and deserve.  And that bar should be pretty darn high.  Remember?  You’re worth the effort.

8.Some days are better than others

Time to buy stock in yoga pants.  Sometimes putting pants on is way too much effort.  You’re going to rock your glasses, a high bun, yoga pants and his old t-shirt.  That’s okay.  It’s okay to fall apart.  

Just remember to always go back to step one.

9.Read

“It’s Called a Breakup Because it’s Broken“.

You can thank me later.

10.Let go

The only person you have control over is yourself.  So although letting go seems impossible, it’s necessary.  It doesn’t mean you don’t love him anymore…it just means you love yourself more.  The best revenge is allowing yourself to live your life EXACTLY the way you want it to be.

caramel sauce and life advice

~ taytertalks ~ 3 Comments

Yesterday, I made a visit to Albertson’s to find some MUCH NEEDED Walden Farms sauces.  I found myself sitting in the car after packing up my groceries to head home.  The kindest man had packed up my groceries inside.  He was special needs, and had the biggest smile.  “Have a nice day”, he beamed.  Such a simple phrase, but I knew he genuinely meant it.  As I sat there, I noticed he had come outside and was gathering carts in the parking lot.  He was so happy.  So eager.  So kind.  He said hello to everyone who passed by. It’s so easy to forget to be happy, or to be kind.  Watching him made my day so much brighter.

When I got home, I scrolled through my Instagram account.  I mean, let’s be serious…we all do this daily.  Photos can certainly tell a story.  I have lived a lot of life.  So many captured moments.  Great friends.  Amazing family.  Love & Heartbreak.  Birthdays.  Achievements.  Failure.

I have made memories, made mistakes and here I am.

This moment.

This is the only place I can be.

PRESENT.

THANKFUL.

Let’s not be jaded by the damage we have done.  Let’s not hold on to the hurt others have caused us or the pain we have caused others.  Let’s move forward.  Pick ourselves up and be better.

And also, go get yourself some Walden Farms.  Their caramel syrup is DELICIOUS!

You will be a better person for it.

(I’m not sponsored for this but SERIOUSLY, I became a better person after consuming their caramel.)

i have a problem

~ taytertalks ~ Leave a comment

I have an addiction.  I mean, a serious SERIOUS problem.

I’m obsessed with The Mindy Project.

Have you seen it?  I mean, it’s hilarious.  I’ve only been watching this show for a week and I’m already into Season 3.  It tackles love, relationship, getting older, falling in love with yourself and it does all of this wrapped up in a big slice of laughs.  Mind you, it takes a lot to get me to laugh at a T.V. show…and this one takes the cake.  My stomach aches constantly from laughter.

If you haven’t been introduced to Mindy yet…you’re welcome.

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Dear Mindy,

Thank you for constantly bringing joy to my life.  I appreciate your loyalty to your friends, your passion for people and your endless supply of sarcasm and wit.  You are hilarious and kind and basically one of my favorite people.  Your honesty gets me through my evenings and make me feel like I’m not quite alone.  My life has become better with you in it.

Friends Forever,

Taylor

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molten chocolate cake and OTHER life events

~ taytertalks ~ Leave a comment

As I was driving home from the gym tonight, I couldn’t get this image out of my mind.  It’s from last year, at an event my work did at Suzie’s Farm in San Diego.  I felt amazing that day.  I wish everyone could feel amazing on most days.  But the good comes with the bad.  That’s just the way things go.

I had a chance to go home to Seattle last weekend.  It was way too short of a trip, and as usual, I didn’t get to see everyone I wanted to see.  I don’t even think I told a lot of people I was coming home.  But…I did get to see my Mom, and it being her birthday weekend and all, she was pretty much the ONLY person I really cared about spending time with.  We had a bit of a scare though, and she ended up in the hospital.

It really puts life into perspective when you think you might lose someone you love so much.  Thankfully, she’s okay and is recovering just fine.  She’s a fighter like that.  And of course her only concern, the entire time and even now, was how her health was affecting me.  She’s so cute.  Always taking care of others and putting their needs above her own. I love her.

She’s definitely a big supporter in my fitness journey.  We have certainly had our struggles, but she is my mother and I don’t ever want to take that for granted.  I’m lucky and I am appreciating her more and more every day.  I would call her my #numberonefan, but my Bestie has already claimed that title.  Let’s call her my #numbermomfan…I think that covers it. Funny story actually…I learned that my mom trained for a show back when I was younger, but 1.  I don’t really remember it and 2.  I probably don’t remember it because she never ended up competing because she broke her tailbone.  How does that even happen??  I’ll have to ask her.   I don’t know why I haven’t already.

I’ve been a bit of a stress case the last week because of my trip.  I missed some workouts, wasn’t following my macros like I should have, and I was traveling which always leads to…water bloat.  Honestly I know it doesn’t really matter because I had the best time, and my mother’s health is way more important and she and I shared the most AMAZING Molten Chocolate Cake from Ponti Seafood and Grill while in Fremont.

I mean… It.  Was.  Life.  Changing.

@pontigrill

Anway…I’m back to Denver and back on track.  And my mom is happy and healthy.

Today was a solo posing class.  A needed a makeup day since I missed the group class on Sunday due to travel.  I have to say, I am part of an amazing training crew.  My trainer, Kasey, is a sarcastic hard ass and will call me out in a heartbeat.  I love her.  My posing and nutrition coach, Alysha, is a wealth of knowledge and I think she would give me her left arm if it would help me reach my goals.

Team Fit Chick is basically, 100%, real life, incredible.

When you find people who believe in you, celebrate who you are, support you and push you forward…NEVER LET THEM GO!  It’s such a blessing to be surrounded with such motivating people.  Plus, they make me see that I’m not crazy for always believing that I was meant for something greater.  For believing that my hopes and dreams aren’t unrealistic or insane.

But you gotta work hard!!  You have to show up!  That’s half the battle!

Love others, love yourself, be kind.

Let’s do this.